Some new year thoughts

[indigo_rose99]

For our 2003 New Years party, we wrote and had our guests write haikus about time.  Aging.  New year.  Technology.  Politics.  Or as many as you can fit into a haiku.  I kept them, and always meant to write them down.  This seems like an excellent time to record them. 

Where's my flying car?
I was promised flying cars!
Damn Republicans.
  -- T & Indigo_rose99 (the original example for our guests)

Welcome the future
Full of fizzled promises
Et tu, Y2K?
  -- chikuru

As we boldly go
Where no man has gone before
Trillion dollar debt
  -- chikuru

The Patriot Act
It is where the future was
1984
  -- chikuru

I pray for clean skies
and the cool, green hills of earth.
Damn Republicans!
  -- thereisnomagic

I want my Soma!
I was promised happy drugs!
Damn Republicans!
  -- thereisnomagic

Hal's legacy lives
Computers control the world.
I want privacy.
  -- Mark & Patricia

My cleaning robot
My automated kitchen
Nowhere to be seen.
  -- 2/3 T & 1/3 Indigo_rose99

Cars that drive themselves.
Picture phones, teleporters,
Would make travel nice.
  -- Indigo_rose99

Books on palm 'puters,
Wireless phones and GPS...
Never mind.  Got those.
  -- Indigo_rose99

Strange new things all round.
Sold with glitter, gold and threat
and I, bought not one.
  -- ?

Neal Armstrong's footprints
Why aren't we living on Mars?
Stupid Democrats (Damn Republicans)
  -- Mark & Patricia

Map real D.N.A.
With Electrophoresis
Ages ten and up
  -- thereisnomagic

And now it has been
Fifty years since fifty-four.
Orwell rests in peace.
  -- thereisnomagic

Since replaces Freud
with Paxil, Prozac, Zoloft.
Dreams are left for Niel.
  -- thereisnomagic

Raise livestock at home:
A fully automated
slaughterhouse/kitchen.
   -- thereisnomagic

Intelligent cats
Have enslaved the human race.
Future?  Right.  You wish.
  -- raaga123? cartaufalous?  Unsigned.

No TV phones means
I can talk, smirk, roll my eyes,
The other stays calm.
  -- livingdeb

No transporters mean
Car wrecks, exhaust fumes, road rage,
Time to read on bus.
  -- livingdeb

The hiss of static
Huge pixels cavort slowly
Today, same TV still.
  -- cartaufalous

After all these years,
Life at last becomes worthwhile!
Hail HDTV!
  -- raaga123

"Hail HDTV?"
I'm so tired of hearing that.
I want holograms!
  -- raaga123

Hardware conflicting
Toaster does not see the fridge.
Microsoft future!
  -- T

No call from E.T.
Silent radio static.
We are still alone.
  -- thereisnomagic

Doctor Doolittle
could speak with animals, but
We are still alone.
  -- thereisnomagic

I ask the network,
"Computer, are you aware?"
We are still alone.
  -- thereisnomagic

Physics brings bad news;
No shortcut to the stars.
We are still at home.
  -- thereisnomagic

Do we know each other?
Can you share my thoughts?  My mind?
I am still alone.
  -- thereisnomagic

Drought.  Flood. Tornadoes.
Dark clouds loom over the world.
I want MTV.
  -- ?

For empire's glory
A solder falls far away.
The blind lead us.
  -- ?

Reptoids speak old truth.
The hidden future erupts.
The past is a lie.
  -- ?

Endless void outstretched,
Tiny lights explore beyond,
Where are our far kin?
  -- ?

Isaac Asimov
Dreams of artificial men,
artificial slaves.
  -- thereisnomagic

First law: harm no one.
Second law: follow orders.
Third law: protect self.
  -- thereisnomagic

Isaac Asimov
has no positronic brain,
programs the Roomba.
  -- thereisnomagic

First law:  Clean the floor
Second law:  Remote controlled
Third law: Avoid stairs.
  -- thereisnomagic

Cherubino Squeak
of world's smartest cats
Maow's little brother.
  -- Mark & Patricia

Frodo & Sam Wise
So perilously laden
Journey to Mount Doom.
  -- Mark & Patricia

Seven hour work week
We have been waiting too long
Democrat bastards!
  -- ?

Better living through
Chemistry, geography
Biology, Math.
  -- ?

Stormtroopers hobbits
Luke Skywalker Gandolf
R2D2 ENT
  -- ?

No weather stations;
Chaos still rules the thunder
Lightning is untamed.
  -- ?  perhaps thereisnomagic handwriting

Any additional contributions for the new year?

Comments

Shiny!

[thereisnomagic.livejournal.com]

Thanks for posting all of these. I had forgotten most of what I had written. I'm currently being less than social in the Pub with seven of my friends and one of their dogs, and waiting on food and coffee.

Re: Shiny!

[indigo-rose99.livejournal.com]

I was really surprised by how funny and still-appropriate many of them are.

Re: Shiny!

[raaga123.livejournal.com]

"Less than social" in public with seven of your friends?

thereisnomagic
is unclear on this concept:
hermits lurk alone!

Awesome haikus

[fraeuleinchen.livejournal.com]

Thanks for posting these.
Makes me sad I wasn't there...
what are new years for?!

[A www.threadless.com T-shirt which was a Christmas gift from my brother:

Haikus are easy
but sometimes they don't makes sense
Refrigerator.]