Who's that knocking at my door?

[indigo_rose99]

My doorbell only seems to ring if I am insufficiently clothed to answer it.

I've learned to look out an upstairs window before bothering to throw on clothes.  This was not the neighborhood kids.  A man with a clipboard, an official-looking baseball hat, and... a small unmarked SUV??  One of these things does not fit with the others...

I put on a robe, but asked through the closed door, "Can I help you?"

"Yes, ma'am, does $husbandfirstname $husbandlastname live here?"

"Yes?" I tried to inject both the answer to his question and a polite So what's it to ya into my tone.

There was a really long pause.  I became convinced that he was waiting for me to open the door.  "And?!?" I asked impatiently.  I don't open the door without a good reason.  This was not it.

"I'm from $longstringofcompanynames."  I recognized our internet cable provider in the list, but couldn't decipher the rest.  "You have been a customer for...." There was a shuffling of paper.  "for such a long time.  I've been given permission to come install you an upgrade for just $15."

There were too many things wrong with that.  I couldn't address it all in one sentence.  "Did you call?"

"No."  Yeah, I know you didn't!  Shame!

"And when you say $15, you really mean $15 per month?"

"Yes."

Very firmly, "No."  And I walked away from the closed door.

*           *           *

I had two strong theories at the time:

• It was a scam to get into the house.  Once inside...  Well, bad things.
• It was a scam to find out who was home during the day in a street of houses.  Once they find out who is home, they can come back later...
  

T had a different theory:

• If he came and got a signature, then they could feel justified about charging $15/month from then until the end of time.  Since they didn't call in advance, there is a smaller chance that the person who knew it would be a bad idea to pay for this "upgrade" would be present or have left directions to reject it.  And he theorized that the person at home would be more of a pushover to someone physically knocking on the door.

Comments

[livingdeb.livejournal.com]

Evidence:
1. Clipboard = legit or disguise
2. Official-looking hat - not enough information - was there a name or logo?
3. Unmarked van = evildoer or coincidence because guy was dropped off by company or car is far away
4. Knows a valid name = legit or found by looking in mailbox
5. Waits to hear your voice, then asks about name of other gender = suspicious or coincidence - was the name mentioned the same as the person who gets billed for the recognized service?
6. Long string of company names = suspicious
7. You couldn't decipher them = legit (this guy has been saying them so long that he can no longer enunciate them properly)
8. Can't find how long you've been a customer = suspicious. If this is part of a script, it should all be there.
9. Installation = getting into the house = scary or routine
10. Didn't call = suspicious
11. Admits he didn't call = legit or beginner scammer who didn't know to say, "someone is always supposed to call."
12. Admitting means $15 per month = legit

I'm getting mixed signals. But I don't even go for upgrades when someone calls me, lets alone drops by--they have to mail something.

[indigo-rose99.livejournal.com]

My read: No matter how we play it, they were trying something unpleasant. At best, it was our internet cable company trying to get more money out of us in an underhanded way. At worst...

[raaga123.livejournal.com]

If you're really curious about which one it was, you can always call the cable company and ask if they sent someone out.

[indigo-rose99.livejournal.com]

You are right. I spend about 15 minutes trying to find a phone number before giving it up as more trouble than it is worth. *sigh* I probably should have been more persistent, given how much he freaked me, but T distracted me successfully.