indigo_rose99

the first week

2018-03-19T00:17:45Z

I expected it to be too much information too fast. And it was. I could not take notes fast enough. And I took a lot of notes.

The people were nice. I expected that, as people are typically nice to newcomers.

What I did not expect was the empty parking lot at 5:30pm. It is a pretty big company. Every large-company job I've ever had talked a good talk about "we value our employees" and "work life balance is important to us" but at the end of the day it was all BS. The expectation at every large company is that employees would be worked until they dropped of exhaustion. And "salaried" is an excuse to expect 60-70 hour work weeks without paying overtime. Laptop computers, VPNs and wifi on our homes just extended the expectations that all employees would never be able to truly leave work behind.

But... this company is different. They talk the same talk, but they seem to actually do it. I couldn't believe that parking lot at 5:30pm. And there was a clear expectation that "You should NOT be in the building after 6pm." and another one of "You better have a REALLY REALLY good reason for working 60+ hours in a week." ...It was a shock. A good shock!

Switching to a Mac is going to be an uncomfortable. I miss my PC. But otherwise I'm looking forward to the challenge of figuring out how I can make this company better.

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Life and decisions and kittens

2018-02-19T19:33:28Z

I have told everyone. I told the new company I'm taking the new job. I told my current boss that I am quitting. Within 15 minutes of doing so, I felt so much less stressed. I guess having all my balls rolling in the same direction is less stressful than having them crash against each other in my head.

So yeah. I'm changing jobs. I have a plane ticket for middle of next month to go to a week of orientation. More likely 2 days of orientation then several days of following people around and asking lots of questions. I volunteered for the last part. It seems like a good and fast way to both meet people, learn a ton of stuff about processes, and convince others I'm human and can be asked questions in return.

In the meantime, I'm winding down on this job. Trying to finish up my biggest current project. Making lists for the person who will take over my job. In spite of my many efforts to the contrary, lots of things are only in my head. Must write it all down! My poor replacement... He has a lot of reading ahead of him.

So T's idea was "If you are making a hugely stressful life change, we might as well get kittens now and get it all over with. ...Right?" Yesterday he bought kitten chow and was looking at litter in the grocery store. This morning I discovered that the huge box that was delivered yesterday was actually a cat litter box. I'm trying to remember that kittens are generally adorable and purr, but the idea of sharing my space with two other beings is... ick. I hate the idea. Only true love for T could convince me that this is inevitable (not a "Good Idea," just inevitable). We've been without a cat now for a little over a year. But the last one was outdoors. I still miss him, but there is a big difference between 2 indoor kittens into EVERYTHING and an outdoor cat who thought my lap was a wonderful place to hang out for 45 minutes. T just hopes I can avoid killing them until they become fat lazy cats.

So as my old job winds down and before the new job kicks into overdrive, I will likely have some time to so some hobby stuff. Not sure how I can fit in more paintings, but perhaps some of my other hobbies...

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change

2018-02-14T12:43:47Z

I hate change. Hate it, hate it, hate it!

Big life changes are particularly scary. Yesterday just before going out on my Valentine's date with T, I got both the job offer and the money number. It is.... respectable. And more than I'm making now. Enough more to make a difference in the mortgage payment that is ballooning in March because the mortgage company CAN demand I pay that much. T thinks I should just flat take the new job. I'm going to meet with my current boss this morning and talk about the future of my current company and job. And of course, if he can at least attempt to match the new job offer. I told the HR guy for the new job that I would at the latest give him an answer on Thursday.

Ack, but this is terrifying. I hate the thought of leaving my current company. So many things undone! I would totally want to take 2 weeks to just finish out the things I'm working on. Which leads directly to the thought of what if my current boss cannot match their offer? Or attempt to? So much change!

More travel. Expected 25% for at least a year or longer. Domestic only to middle-of-nowhere. And still persistent travel to the same boring location after that, but perhaps a little less often.

I haven't worked for a large corporation in... um... 16 years? I'm out of practice in adjusting to the weird things large corporations demand of their employees. Ok, yes, I now view them as weird. Small companies are surprisingly flexible about things.

Ugh. Just working through my freaking out.

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